How to Tell Your Personality Type By How You Are Sheltering-At-Home

It is now week 49 of sheltering at home in Central Texas.

(Okay, we are on week 7, but it feels like dog years!)

In most things, this quarantine hasn't affected our family near as much as it has for many others. For instance, my youngest son, who is 17, has already been homeschooling. His schedule hasn't changed, except for the fact that we can't do our regular meet-ups with friends. My 91-year-old mother moved in with us last June because of a fall; but now that she is with us, I don't have to worry about how to take care of her. My oldest son came home from college on April 3rd to finish up his classes. I am thankful that I have my entire family under one roof, together. We know that we are blessed to have many advantages of staying home that other families do not, and we don't take that lightly at all.

I am sure you can agree that sheltering-at-home can bring up some interesting relationship challenges within the family. Everyone can be on top of each other, need their own space, and have their own quirks and pet peeves. And if your family members have different personality types, it can be quite an interesting combination.

My boys and I are the quieter of the personality types: we all have more melancholy traits. We are introverts who can be thoughtful, analytical, idealistic, perfectionists, and faithful friends. We get energy from spending time alone and we sometimes have to be incentivized to get out more and socialize. We are creatives.

But even our melancholy personalities can get bored eventually. It has been important for us to stay busy and productive during the sheltering-at-home or we can fall into depression.

A book that has helped our family is "Personality Plus" by Florence Littauer.  (Now free on Kindle Unlimited).  It was this book that gave us valuable insights on how each family member ticks and how to better relate based on that person's strengths or weaknesses.

There are four main personality types. You could be a

-- spontaneous, vivacious, cheerful Sanguine --
-- thoughtful, faithful, persistent Melancholy --
-- adventurous, persuasive, confident Choleric --
-- friendly, patient, contented Phlegmatic --
-- or a combination of two.

We have unique, God-given assets that can harmonize our relationships at home and work, and help us understand what drives us. It is important to know what strengths to focus on and what weaknesses need to be worked on. When we know how to bring out our best, we can discover who we are meant to be. The author states: "When we know who we are and why we act the way we do, we can begin to understand our inner selves, improve our personalities, and learn to get along with others."

By discovering what personality types are in your family, you can know what makes them act the way they do and how to play to their strengths. This is especially helpful with kids and teens. (Littauer also has a complementary book called "Personality Plus for Parents: Understanding What Makes Your Child Tick.")

musesofamom.comFor Melancholy, we wholeheartedly agree with the experts who encourage us to make time for self-care during this quarantine. Melancholy personalities probably need self-care more than the other three personalities because we are often self-sacrificing. We can also spend time listening to others and helping them solve their problems (it's that loyal friend gene) and forget to spend time on ourselves. And it isn't so much about needing a spa day as it is having quiet time to reflect or create.

Self-care for me is making time to create. That isn't just during the quarantine, but always. I have my own space to craft, my family knows that when the door is closed, it means do not disturb unless the house is burning down. Once I realized that having a regular time to craft and write was helpful to my overall mental health, the more I keep that boundary in my daily life.

The other personalities are much different than the Melancholy. Just during the sheltering at home, you can probably detect the personality traits of friends and family:

-- If you have a family member who is extremely talkative, uses Zoom non-stop to talk with friends, suffers from not being able to hug anyone, comes up with unique ideas for the family to get out of the house, but can also be distracted easily -- meet the Sanguine.

-- The one who is good at motivating the family to action, stays busy (and gets others busy) with home improvement projects, loves a goal but can often be impatient and want things their own way, and was the one who made sure you had enough toilet paper and hand sanitizer -- that's a Choleric.

-- If there is someone in your family who is low-key, agreeable, doesn't get upset easily but also avoids conflict, can take the good with the bad, has a dry sense of humor yet is often a procrastinator -- you have a Phlegmatic.

To summarize: the Choleric will reinforce the mask rule, the Phlegmatic will easily go along with wearing a mask, the Sanguine will forget to take a mask to the store, and the Melancholy will just stay home so they don't have to wear the mask!

While most people tend to relate to one personality type, you can also have a combination of two, with one having more of a role than the other.

Want to know your personality type? I found an easy PDF of a personality profile assessment online based on this book. The assessment gives you an idea of your personality type by your strengths and weaknesses, followed by a summary of each personality's popular traits.

Do you know your personality type? If so, I'd love for you to share something you have learned as a result!



  1. I am in love with this post! I particularly love the descriptions of how each type will handle our new normal. Based on those descriptions, I am choleric and sanguine. But I have wondered about these four types in the past, and have, at different times been convinced I am each one. Perhaps I will try the pdf. Thanks for this information!

    1. Turns out, I was absolutely right! I am choleric and sanguine. Thanks, again. One thing about the cholerics - if we go out, we are the ones who are irritated when others don't observe the 6-feet rule.

    2. Yay! I'm glad you took the assessment! And you're right, Cholerics are rule followers, especially if they are the ones that make the rules! :)

  2. I've done a million and there personality assessments, but haven't heard of this one before. I'm certain choleric is me. 😊

  3. I have done many assessments too -- but have found that this one seems to be the most beneficial and helps you with strengths AND weaknesses.

  4. Did you know that these personality types can help you to find the fashion that makes you look best? This information can be got for free at the site. Advice goes WAY past the correct color choice. I did it myself and it makes shopping so much easier. All my clothes and jewelry now "go" together.


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